That's messed up

Wanna hear something that's messed up? In the year of 2009, I successfully made it out to the gym for some cardio exercise a huge total of 1 time! While I was there on my annual calorie burn, I was completely distracted by a TV commercial of McDonald's new cheeseburger. Now that right there is plain messed up!!!


Wanna hear something else that's messed up?
Back when I got hired for Cycle Gear, I had to get a drug test done. Of course this was water off a ducks back to me because I knew this would be a breeze. I get to the office, fill out the paper work and then I sit and wait for my name to be called. "Brian Bunn... We can take you back now"... the lady says! So, I followed the lady back into the room. In this room was another lady and she has a puzzled look on her face. So I ask... What do you need me to do? She looks at me and says... do you know this is drug test that's taken from your hair? Now you do realize I shaved my head the night before right?

I said to her... have some hair from my arm... your can have all of that you want and there is plenty! It's not long enough she replies! You know... I think that dad-gum woman wanted me to show my moon pie! All for a freaking drug test. By now I'm thinking that I could really fill up a cup of pee right now but you just insist on using hair. Suddenly, I thought, hey... how about my legs! So I pulled up my pants leg and they were like... yeah, now this will work.

So long story short... they took a noticeable chunk of hair from my leg in one spot  and I didn't have to show them my moon pie! Thank goodness!!!

All of that was every bit of messed up!